“I didn’t really think she did a horrible job,” Willis told the assembled crowd. “Yes, I felt it was as lethargic as a drunk turtle dozing under a sunflower after ingesting a bottle of Valium, and I thought it had all the build of a one-story motel, but, I mean, the girl didn’t kill anybody. She didn’t run over your foot. She just cut a very calm and somewhat boring take of one of the peppiest, happiest, most popular songs in history.”

I’m just posting this so I can treasure a beautiful smackdown forever.